Once a papa met a mama under a mango tree...

Its official now...and a post on it is overdue. I have not understood so far the supposed pleasure men experience in harrassing women. Their only motive I can think of is power and it works both ways - if we dont react, then we're pinned as scared of them, and if we do, they're totally invigorated. Isnt that so?

It can be anything - prolonged stares, sexually explicit remarks, cat-calls, shoulder brushes, grabbing...all depending on where you are and how far they think they can go!  There was a time when I used to take these very personally. In fact, I am riddled with such memories especially  from when I was a child. Heres a scary fact - its easy to get over it if you think its not your problem, which is totally justified if you were not equipped to react.

That dispensed with, what do we do when we are greeted with it the minute we get on a bus or walk by a wine shop? There are those who advocate ignoring them and I go with that as long as it remains verbal. But most people misinterpret your silence as a go-ahead to treat you worse.

I would like to relate an incident that took place last friday on an overnight bus. I was totally exhausted from the day's fieldwork and started sleeping as soon as I sat down. In the middle of the night, the girl sitting next to me woke me up saying the guy behind was harassing her. She was literally in tears because he had been  making lewd remarks, pinching her under the pretext of adjusting the window etc.

I couldnt really comprehend what she was saying becuase I had a splitting headache and everything  seemed  vague...Whats is wrong with you? They were pinching you too...In fact they even touched your face, didnt you feel anything???

No, I really didnt! I was dead beat and lost to the world...I am ashamed to say I just told her not to worry and went back to sleep....When I woke up at 6 am, she wasnt there...she had already gotten down....now that I could think clearly I turned around to look at the guy she was talking about...the man with the mustache in blue and gray clothes...he was fast asleep!

Soon it was the last stop and we all had to get down..the guy behind got a call... from his wife I would say by the sound of it...and he was positively sweetness and light....

On an impulse, I stayed where I was and allowed him in the queue in front of me...just when we were about to get down, I mustered all my courage and might and kicked him as hard as I could on the shin....he yelped in pain, stumbled and almost fell....pepper spray in hand I was ready in case he hit back...but he didnt...the coward just picked himself up, didnt even glance back and proceeded as if nothing happened....everyone saw it..the driver, the bus-boy, the other pasengers...no one asked me why I kicked him and I didnt bother to explain...

A giant step for me, a small step for womankind...